Of Weddings and Red Packets...

Social Failures.

In every large scale event a few of them always turn up.

They are usually:

• Very career-oriented
• Consider themselves classy
• Think very highly of their own opinions and believe in absolutes
  
• Materialistic
• Listen to your opinions but usually think they are wrong and
• You can never call them out for a mistake

When you get invited to a wedding, the invitation card has RSVP on it.

When it says "You are cordially invited. RSVP.", it does not mean that a RESERVUP cordial will be served at the wedding. RSVP stands for Répondez, s'il vous plaît. It means Respond If You Please. That's essentially a nice way of saying "We just sent you a bloody nice card. That took effort. If you wish to grace us with your over-inflated ego and would actually like us to prepare food for you then please make the fucking effort to tell us."

I was best man for a wedding recently. 'Best man' is another word for 'Wedding Coordinator'. For those of you who think that you have 'organised' a wedding for a friend, please understand that all you did was 'help out with certain tasks'.

Irksome Incident #1

A prudish-looking lady goes up to reception and doesn't find her name on the register and gets angry.

Reception girls ask "May I have your name, ma'am?"
Prude: " No my name's not there. What game are you all trying to play?"

Back and forth, back and forth, still won't give name. Recep girl runs for help. Me.

Me: Evening Ma'am. Are you acquainted with the bride or groom?
Prude: No ah...why is my name not on the list?
Me: (You can't find it cos it's upside down to you, stupid) May I have your invitation card please?
Prude: I didn't bring it. What do you want it for?
Me: So I can try to check your name with my list. May I have your name then, Ma'am.
Prude: Why should I? My name should be there!
Me: Yes but we have to search for your name.
Prude: I don't know what game you are trying to play young man. You'd better call the bride up here right now!
Me: I can't do that. She's getting ready. Err Did u RSVP?
Prude: Why should I do that? I was invited!

Mein Gott...

Irksome Incident #2 (via MSN)

				Annoyant				i din noe the dinner was not a chinese dinner!
				Annoyant				My date and i bao quite big leh
				Shade				err so?
				Shade				i dont see the connection
				Annoyant				we gauged by the amount
				Annoyant				as in the venue
				Annoyant				so we gave 150
				Annoyant				and the dinner was....
				Annoyant				not a chinese dinner

The conversation carries on with me questioning if she is implying that she didn't get her money's worth. She denies this by challenging me to cut and paste the part where she actually states this.

I don't think I need to.

She then goes on to say that she actually checked online for the price of a Chinese wedding dinner at the location and packed that accordingly. She thinks that the price listed is the exact amount that's paid per person. Basic Budgeting. Fail. But the fact that she under-valued her Ang Pao isn't what bothers me. Her complaining that it wasn't a Chinese dinner is.

And if said person dares to come here and tell me that isn't what she was implying then I beg the opinion of every reader here to tell it as you see it.

I had another friend who couldn't attend because she was 'too broke for the ang pao'.

Since when did attending a wedding dinner become all about the ang pao. You are invited to share in the joy of the newly wedded love birds. Whether you give a big ang pao is irrelevant; it's supposed to represent a well-wish. What matters most is that you are important enough to be invited and the happy couple want to see you in what is possibly the biggest event of their lives. Is it so hard to make that effort?

Her: "Wah! she only give $20!"
Him: "She's from your side of the family you know."

To these couples I say "I hope you get divorced soon."
People like this do not cherish the event.

Since when did weddings become a money-making racket? If really was about the money, I'd get married every month, go on a honeymoon with the proceeds from the wedding and get divorced, thereafter splitting the profits with the new ex-wife.

I see why divorces are on the rise these days.